Hello Boys and Girls,
"Tare": noun
Definition: An allowance made for the weight of the packaging in order to determine the net weight of goods.
Often used by a pediatric nurse trying to get my 3 yr old ruffian to stand on the evil! scale during his checkup, while he is adamantly defiant and hanging and clinging for dear life onto my legs like a baby monkey about to fall into a pit of fire!
Used in a sentence (by the nurse): "How about we allow for the tare, and we weigh you on the scale with him and then you alone, and then get the difference?"
So I maneuver onto the scale in my wedged boots with the screaming monkey still permanently attached to my legs, and judging by the cacophony of sounds that just erupted, an ember from the pit of fire must have singed the baby monkey's butt.
The nurse eventually says, "40lbs."
40 fucking pounds....
I wish I could've just told her that instead of going through this entire song and dance!
What's that you say? Your pediatric nurse doesn't use the word "tare"? It's only reserved for my ruffians?
Of course it fuckin would be!
I'm grateful that the rest of the checkup went smoothly. My ruffian sat quietly with a face full of distrust and suspicion aimed at the doctor, but still he actually did everything she asked and that's what mattered most.
Look at the light
Say "ahhhh"
Breathe deep breaths. <---- his cooperation on this one stunned me the most.
And then the doc said he wouldn't need shots.
Thank God!
That meant I wouldn't need a shot of my own when I got home! :)
-Shirley
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