Shirley's 2015 Resolutions

Live More Simply

Since Qori died, I knew I had lost not only my best friend but one of my greatest sources of stress relief.  And I don't handle stress well.  So during my mourning, I tried to figure out what I needed to be happy without Qori, and how to minimize the stress.  The one glaring thing that I kept coming back to was embracing simplicity.  Whether this was in my cooking, in my shopping, around the house, at work; I just needed to remove the complexity and live a simple life, to avoid stress 

Goals:

• Remove clutter, organize house and desk at work
• Don't be wasteful in your spending.  Do you really need another OPI nail polish shade?
• Continue your goal at clean-eating in the kitchen
• Take time to appreciate nature

Be More Active

My Fitbit really helped me out last year, but there are some things that it was just lacking.  The fitbit focuses on number of steps, but I've got more I need to work on, namely lifting my butt and flattening my belly.  I will continue working with my fitbit, but I know I've got to look for some other apps to help me feel accomplished on my butt and tummy.  Additionally, I'm just not that active naturally.   As a homebody and introvert, I can't just get up and go.  So I'm going to do some fighting against my own natural tendencies, and take myself "out" of my comfort zone, so to speak.


Maintain Happiness

This one is fully-loaded.   I went through a depression with Qori's death.  I know it's not possible to always be happy, which is why "be happy" is not my resolution.  There will be highs, there will be lows, and my resolution is to stay as positive as possible during those lows.

What makes me happy?

• Animals - I'm very close to getting another dog.
• Nature - I will need to surround myself in nature more often
• Photography - Watch out Instagram!
• Video Editing - I stopped this awhile back, but I'm losing out on preserving my children's childhood moments
• Journaling - I'm going to need to pick up the pace on this blog again!

Enrich Family Time

This year, Diego will be entering Kindergarten.  I want to make sure he's prepared, so enriching our time spent together is key.  We have a lot of days where we get stuck in the Skylanders or iPad rut.  My plan is to add more arts & crafts, book readings, and mini-chalkboard lessons into our routine.

We'll also be enrolling him in an extra-curricular activity.  Some type of Karate is looking promising at this point.

Hubby too, is included in this resolution.  We'll need more date nights.  We might have only had one or two this year. In 2015, I'd like to try to have 1 every 2 months or so. 6 in one year?! Seems like a steep goal ;)

And finally, time with my extended family is important as well.  Especially, my parents and my sis (and her family).  We'll continue to invite my parents to some of our weekend outings, but we'll also extend invitations to my sis.  That way, the boys will bond more with their cousin Emily, uncle & aunt, and grand parents.

Let's see if I can stick to these!

Shirley (Mama-Ruff)

New Family Pets & Basking Buddy

There's no question I'm a dog lover.  And since Qori's passing I knew I was going to get another dog eventually.  However, I wanted to "ease" into it by getting something small.  I flirted with a guinea pig for awhile.

My people eat them, you know?  What would happen if our pet went missing after a family party?!!!  I kid, I kid. We're Americanized.  ;)

Ultimately, I didn't think I could bond with anything other than a dog, and even flirted with a small dog, like a Chihuahua, but I'm not Paris Hilton my Aunt.  If I were going to get a dog, it's go big or go home!  I'm just not a small dog kinda girl anymore, though they sure are cuties.

So I decided that my indecisiveness is a sign that I'm still not ready, so I curbed my dog plans for a short while.  Instead, we decided to ask our kids what pets they wanted.  Imagine that!?  Diego (4 y/o) was very clear; he wanted a turtle.

Mateo (2 y/o) on the other hand was leaning towards a chicken or pet bird.  After a few weeks of getting the same, consistent answer from Diego, we went to Chinatown and came home with 2 turtles: Leonardo and Donatello. 

Both boys are very happy with their pet turtles.  Diego is nervous to hold his turtle, which is good because Leonardo is skittish.  Mateo on the other hand is very 'hands-on' with is turtle, to which we fear his turtle's safety sometimes.  It's a good thing his turtle is more active, and not skittish like Diego's turtle.  I guess each turtle was meant for each boy!

So these past weeks, I've watched every youtube video ever made about Red Eared Slider turtles and how to set up their tank; it's become my obsession.  Hubby says I'm taking things too far, but I'm just an animal lover who also happens to be obsessed with interior design (terrarium tanks included).

I realized that the store clerk in Chinatown did not give us all the facts.  So one by one, I've been buying all the necessities for Leo and Don.  I'll probably post pics once I get a few more things.  One thing I recently learned is that turtles require UVB lamps.  Their terrarium should not be placed in direct sunlight due to flucuating temperatures.

So while waiting for the UVB lamp to come in, I decided to share, with the turtle boys, my favorite part of the house this weekend: my deck. For some much needed and natural UVB-love.  I love to bask out there on a hot day, its way better than any spa, in my opinion.

That's when I realized that my spirit animal is probably a turtle, and I may or may not have bonded with Donatello over the weekend.

My new basking buddy and me, having our moment, he's the only one who understands me...

Mama Turtle Ruff - Shirley

August 2014 Month in Pics

Yet another month has gone by and no posts.  I'm really disappointed in myself.  Missing out on documenting my children's childhood here.  Luckily - it's only here in the blogsphere.  We've actually been quite active LIVING, so I guess that's good, right? Lots of rides this month & my nails.... man- I love my natural nails lately.

-Shirley (Mama-Ruff)
Check us out on Instagram @simplyshirley08

Ugly Flamingos

A sudden bravery fueled by laziness took over me as I called and called and CALLED a certain Filipino restaurant to place a dinner order for pickup.  No one answered.  They NEVER answer, and each time that I physically reach the restaurant, I find the woman on the phone speaking Tagalog, probably on an extended overseas call that HAS to occur every Thursday: my only "get of jail the kitchen" day.

So I was mad at the restaurant, but Hubs insisted on Tapsilog and I insisted that there was no way I was going to cook.  So I thought, 'You asked for it, Filipino restaurant.  Now I will place my order when I physically get there.................. with my Ruffians.  And I'll stand back and let them unleash their wrath among your restaurant and patrons.  And if you even so much as give me a stink eye, the only thing I'll respond with is:  "Next time, pick up your phone....."

But when I got there, Chatty-Kathy of Manila wasn't there.  Instead a subdued woman was in her place.  It was sort of calm and peaceful.  Did they even have a phone now?  Did they silence the ringer?

So I sat the boys at a table and tried to keep the boys entertained as we waited for the food.

So, how was your day?  What did you do with Abu? I asked.

"Mama-Mam-mam, we went to the store and made Abu crazy and Mateo kicked Abu and Mateo was crying and Abu said [------ deep breath and pause]  No toys for Mateo!"
[distracted] "Mama-mam-mam look at that!" he yelled in his high pitch a few decibels too high for the restaurants atmosphere.  He was pointing at three paintings on the wall.  One with lucky fish, one with horses, and the last one with blue heron birds.

"It's a FISH!" he shreiked!  "And HORSES!!" he marveled.

"And what's that last one?" I asked, expecting him to say it was a bird.

Instead, very matter-of-factly he said, "It's an ugly flamingo."

I cracked up very stunned by his response.  He was so proud that he had made me laugh that he kept saying "Ugly Flamingo" all the way home.

Sure it was funny, but I was also a little saddened at that moment.  A little of his innocence was gone in his ability to discern between beauty and ugliness.  For me beauty is a mature concept. It's a sign that he's growing up now that he's calling things ugly.  And it will be up to me to instill the concept that it's not nice to call people ugly.  I hope it's not a hard concept for me to instill.

But for now, he's got a point.  Compared to flamingos, blue herons are pretty damn ugly!

-Shirley (Mama-Ruff)

The Favorite

30-something years ago a woman lost her husband to leukemia.  She was left with two boys roughly the ages of my Diego and Mateo.  Who knew what she fears she felt for her future as a widowed mother.  I don't even know what or how I'd be able to cope.  It would have been great if someone could've told her that she'd be OK.  That she'd stay in the house that her husband bought them and raise 2 gentlemen who would go on to get married and give her the gift of grand-motherhood.

This woman was my aunt, whom I respect so much.  So when she asked me which of my sons was my favorite in such a sneaky way (In Spanish she asked me which one tugs at my heart strings harder) there was no question on who I immediately pointed to, although I wouldn't verbally acknowledge anything.

He just has a heart of gold.  He thinks about others.

When you sneeze, he will say "Bless you, are you sick???"

When he's eating, he'll share and will say, "You want some?  YES??"

When his brother decides that he wants the iPad that he's holding, he simply gives it to him!

He will try to tuck me into bed, and then he will want to snuggle. And snuggles with him are great since he's chunky.

My husband jokes that Mateo will leave the house first when he's older because some girl will steal his heart and he will fall deeply in love. I don't doubt it.

So that's my Tater at 2.5 years, in a nutshell!

And even though I treat my children equally, my aunt had a way of not making me feel bad for admitting that I had a favorite.  I never meant to have a favorite.  It just happened.

Just like my aunt and countless other mothers out there.  She made it sound so justified as she described a shopping scene many years ago with her 2 boys and their $10 allowance.

While the eldest, Jovan, would cry, scream, and demand more money to afford the toy he wanted; Jason - her youngest was more methodical about it.  He'd stand there, thinking out loud, "If I buy these two toys, I can't afford this third toy. But I can buy the third toy by itself, and give up the other 2 toys...." he would think about it and you could see a wrinkle forming in his brain.

My aunt's heart would melt at the sight, so much that she'd just throw more money at him.  LOL.

So it seems that, similarly, my youngest has stolen my heart.  I didn't want my youngest to be my favorite simply because he would be my last, but Tater has perfected the art of cuteness in a way I never expected, a way that I cannot resist.

-Shirley (Mama-Ruff)

Where I'm At (An update and Instagram pics)

These past few months, you've been able to find me on Instagram (@simplyshirley08), but not on this blog.  Although we've been having a good time, living life as shown through the pics below, I still didn't post here very often.  All it took was one big loss (Qori), for me to go on somewhat of a hiatus on this blog. I didn't want my written thoughts to wander too deeply into a depression.

I've been meaning to get back to blogging and find inspiration in other things, but so far all I have are half-written posts that never made it out there. 

Where am I at in my head and heart now?  Well - deep down inside I'm starting to feel truly better about Qori's passing, but many times still I miss him dearly.  I think I'm almost at a place in my heart where I can truly start to write genuine posts again without being a Debbie-downer.

So I'm starting with some baby-steps in an Instagram compilation post that I've let stack up for the past three months.  Here's what we've been up to in April, May & June via Instagram pics:

I hope you are all doing better than I have been lately! -Shirley (Mama-Ruff)